A Moment of Realization!

Hi Everyone,

Its been a couple weeks since I've written, but nothing has been forgotten.  I have been going through quite a few changes, personally, physically and in my career.  It has been a long... LONG two weeks, but I am excited to share everything with you.

I moved in with my boyfriend!  :o  I know I'm not the first, I will not be the last independent woman to make that transition, but that doesn't make it any less challenging.  There were quite a few ups and downs before the actual move in date and there are still a few every now and then.  We were both constantly tired, under a lot of stress with the move and work and trying to make sure everything went smoothly.  Lots of fights and miscommunications, but we got through it.  My boyfriend is completely unpacked, and I still have two boxes of clothes and a box for the office that I haven't gotten to yet.  Mostly because I have no idea where to put it all.

The animal (cat and dog) are going through transitions.  Fiona (my little cat) still doesn't like to be around the big bad monster dog (precious boarder collie that just wants to play).  Mola (the collie) keeps eating all of Fiona's food (maybe that's where the aggression is stemming from...) but growls at fiona if she gets too close to her food bowl.

Fiona's potty training is going well.  She is a little bit behind schedule but that's because I didn't want to bump her up to the next level before we moved and now I want to make sure she is on a good routine before we go to stage number two.  My boyfriend keeps telling me that we have all the time in the world, so there is no need to push or pressure her, but I would like to see her move on to phase two.  We have been on phase one since June (3 months) I think probably for the first of September I will move her up. :)

I've been doing a lot of growth in my career.  Trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up and I think the answer to the question is a social media consultant and sales leader.  I am trying to actually focus on my own brand.  Spend some time on my own pages and make sure I have everything inline for when the the opportunities come flooding in. :)  ANY ideas suggestions or recommendations are always welcome.

I am so used to doing like 10 different things at once that focusing on just one and trying to make it happen is difficult.  I need to outline a budget for myself and a business plan.  Also, I need to dedicate time everyday for my own postings, musings, videos, editing etc to make sure that when someone googles Amanda Social Media they don't get a crappy social media page. :)  Also I need to get my confidence up and running again and stop being afraid.

I think fear is our biggest inhibitor.  And its not always the traditional fear that people thing about.  Its not being scared of not making it or being scared of the unknown.... it being so deathly afraid that if we do it and do it well and make it and actually succeed, what is going to happen to us.  Will we be able to keep up? What if people don't really like it or you? and How are you going to continue to move forward if you've tapped out everything you have on the first try.

The trick I am learning is to believe in myself.  Not in the stereotypical disney version way, I'm not going to break into song.. but to believe that you can, that you will, and when it gets to that next step and you need to again, you did, and you can and you will. And I keep reminding myself that I'm the one that puts this pressure on me to succeed.  Maybe I don't become the president of my very own multinational consulting conglomerate, but each step on the ladder is another rung closer and something that I should be proud of.  If I don't make it all the way to the top, just by climbing up I've made it farther than most.

So, that's what I'm doing.  I am starting my climb.  I am starting my business and I am starting towards my own personal definition of success.

Thanks for reading.  I will write again this weekend with my continuation of the book.  I just needed to get some of this out of my mind.  Thanks for listening. Let me know what you think in the comments.  Can you relate? Have you gone through this before?  I would love to hear about it.